The Ten Commandments of Fiction Writing, Part Six

As a student of the art of fiction, there are several axioms and pieces of advice that I come across again and again; "show, don't tell", "write what you know", "don't trick the reader", etc. These aren't items from a single book, they're everywhere. Some of them surely originate with specific authors, but as ideas they've taken on a life of their own, becoming more than something one person said.

In this series, I will try to gather all those admonitions, encouragements, and adages into a single, definitive list; the Ten Commandments of Fiction Writing. Hopefully this will be as fun and educational for you as it is for me.

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Commandment Six: Words are sacred, thou shalt not abuse them

We've already touched on this, but it's one of the most important things to realize when you become a writer: Words are powerful. Like anything powerful, they must be wielded responsibly.

Take a moment and try to imagine the world before written language. Try to imagine how much harder everything would be. These days, our thoughts exist almost exclusively in written language, much to the chagrin of previous generations. We text and email more than we talk. We post on Facebook instead of calling to catch up with friends. (Some people bemoan this state of affairs. I, on the other hand, am a huge fan of it, for reasons I won't go into now)

Try to imagine your typical day without writing. I'll give you a hint: it's impossible. You can't even wake up on time, because there's no such thing as numerals to put on a clock. You can't order breakfast off a drive-through menu. You can't do any work, because there are no computers, and no books from which to learn skills.

Writing is the foundation of all knowledge. It is the beginning of progress. (Like this quote? Click here to tweet it!) Speech predates writing, possibly by millennia, but without the ability to transmit ideas beyond one's immediate space and time, progress was effectively nonexistent. The ability to cast ideas in a lasting medium makes the transmission and growth of knowledge possible.

Even when we write to entertain, we wield this awesome power. Anything that blasphemes against or abuses the power of words is at odds with the choice to write. If you deny the power of written words, why on Earth would you want to be a writer?

So what does this mean in practical terms? On the most basic level, it means you owe it to yourself and your potential readers to learn everything you can about words. Learn your parts of speech. Learn grammar. Learn linguistics, if you can. LEARN. Don't assume that just because you write a mean memo, or occasionally say something eloquent over cocktails, you know everything you need to know about words. You can never know too much.

One of the most overlooked crimes against words is the careless use of punctuation. Don't get me wrong, nobody is perfect, least of all myself. But readers can tell the difference between a small misstep like an unnecessary comma and a writer who just doesn't care. Punctuation marks are the accessories that ornament your words. They are the boundaries that divide them. Their use or misuse supplies meaning and subtlety. At least try to use them right.

Part of the reason I feel entitled to speak as forcefully as I do is because I'm guilty of every crime I condemn. When I started out as a writer, I couldn't tell you the difference between a preposition and a pronoun. I didn't know what a parallelism was. Worst of all, I didn't think I needed to learn these things; I thought I could get by on my innate facilities.

I still have plenty to learn. I'm still a little shaky on semicolons; I tend to use them when I probably shouldn't. But learning is a part of my regular routine now, and my knowledge base is always expanding.

Another part of revering words is not using them cavalierly. Purple prose is among the worst crimes an author can commit, because it saps words of their power.

If you are alive in the twenty-first century, you probably come across words that have lost their meaning every day. "Free" doesn't mean what it used to. Neither do words like "vintage", "sale", or "literally".

How about profanity? When you were little, the word "fuck" probably seemed like the gravest transgression you could ever commit. Unless you're a sheltered little lamb who doesn't use the internet, you probably don't even bat an eye at the word "fuck" anymore. I sure as shit don't. I fucking use it all day long.

Or how about exaggeration? Was that really the best hamburger you've ever eaten? Did that slice of cheesecake really change your life? Of course not. In speech, these kind of exaggerations are acceptable, because they disappear the moment they're spoken, or at least the moment they're forgotten by whoever hears them. And if they're being used for comic effect, exaggerations are fine in speech or writing. Megadeth's new album didn't literally shred my face off, but it's amusing to talk that way about heavy metal.

Purple prose is what happens when writers strain for effect. It's what happens when writers become too self-assured, too impressed with their ability to wield complex words. Words may not cost you anything to use, but when you write overwrought, flowery sentences like "The sun hid behind ivory clouds that gave its light the texture of a rippled curtain draped over the infinite window of the sky" when you could have said "It was cloudy", you harm those words. Every unnecessary over-extension is another step in a word's gradual descent into meaninglessness.

You might get away with disrespecting words. People do. But you can't expect to. And even though you can, that doesn't mean you should.

Common Style Problems (FenCon Writer's Workshop Part 3)

Editors and publishers all have their pet peeves, and most of them are founded on reasonable principles. Ultimately, writing style is all about making your story easier to read, and good editors will always try to push you in that direction.

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The following series comes to us from guest blogger and author Tom Howard.

Learn more about Tom by visiting his Amazon Author Page, and check out Tom's latest story in The Good Fight, an anthology of superhero vs. monster stories.

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FenCon--a long-running science fiction and fantasy convention in Dallas, Texas--hosts an affiliated writers workshop every year, where professional writers share their own experiences with beginning writers in intensive workshops.

My own writing is at a too comfortable plateau, and I attended to learn some new skills to improve my writing. I've enjoyed FenCon writing workshops before and always find something to take away.

I attended the workshop with my friend and frequent collaborator, Belinda Christ. I think she has attended them all. Like me, she's always searching for community and new tools to improve her trade.

This year, 2015, urban fantasy writer, Jaye Wells, did a four-day class for a dozen writers on critiquing each others' work. Ms. Wells used our comments as a springboard to present sessions on structure, conflict, and the other areas writers need to learn their craft.

Part Three - Common Style Problems

The following list of style problems rank among the most aggravating to editors and publishers. Do everything to avoid them.

• Too many that's. The word "that" is almost always clutter. Occasionally, you need it for clarity, but 75% of the time, it can be left out.
• Bad Dialogue Punctuation. Not knowing where to use your commas and periods is a sure path to the slush pile. Pick up a novel and punctuate the dialogue as the author does. [Pete: and check out my post on dialogue mechanics.]
• Missing comma before direct address. "Good morning, O'Dell." not "Good morning O'Dell."
• You don't need the speaking verb (said) if you have an action line surrounding the dialogue. [Pete: for more on this, check out my post about beats]
• Fancy synonyms for "said". Action lines are best, but some old-school editors insist on only using "said". But the worst thing you can do is use a thesaurus to keep from using "said". Obscure synonyms are distracting, and adverbs and adjectives should be avoided in dialogue.
• Too many subordinate clauses and participle phrases. "As" and "ing" phrases are a matter of timing. They show two actions happening simultaneously, and some things you can't do simultaneously.
• Cliche beginnings. Don't start the story with a line of dialogue. Or with a character waking up. Or with the weather.
• Ellipses fever. It's tempting to use ellipses every time you want a drawn out pause, but it also gets annoying to look at, and readers skip over them more often than not. Know how to use them correctly. In dialogue, ellipses indicate trailing off, an em dash (—) indicates interrupting.  One in every paragraph is not acceptable. And don't use ellipses to indicate pauses in middle of dialogue. Break up dialogue with action.
• Tense shifts. Past tense should be past and present should be present for the entire thing. No shifting back and forth.
• Risky grammar. If you're going to use conjunctions at the beginning of sentences, know what rules you're breaking. Every time you do this, you risk looking like you don't know.
• Uncommon punctuation. A semi-colon should be used sparingly or not at all. Colons, too.
• Too much narrative distance. Character's voice should not only be dialogue but also the narrative. Third person point of view should be close and not omniscient. Distancing words like "she saw", "she looked", and "she felt" separate the reader from the character. Watch your narrative distance closely.

Jaye Wells' general suggestions:

• Get a copy of Strunk and White's Elements of Style and look up specific questions. No need to read it from cover to cover.
• Use Grammarly to check your work.
• For the Oxford comma (a, b, and c), use the publishing house's style guide, but use the serial comma for clarity.
• Don't spend a lot of money on marketing (cons, readers) when you should spend it on learning the craft. Use margielawson.com if you want to workshops from Margie Lawson personally.
• RWA (Romance Writers of America) does great Craft and Business workshops that apply to all writers.
• The MFA program at Seton Hill is a crash course on writing that equals ten years worth of experience.
• The Rule of Three: If a writer brings up something three times, it is IMPORTANT and will be part of the plot and climax. Conversely, if you mention something more than once, you'd better involve it in the plot.
• Pope in a Pool: Look for opportunities to break up exposition with active events. The pope could be swimming laps in the background during a long exposition dump.

Indy's Comma Rules

A friend from my critique group is always haranguing the rest of us about our poor comma usage. I will freely admit that commas are one area I still struggle with, even though I work as a professional editor. The unfortunate fact is that usage conventions vary by country, era, and style guide. But my friend Indy sent along the more universal and comprehensive list of comma rules I've come across since The Elements of Style, and I'd like to pass it along to you.

• Rule 1: Use commas to separate three or more words, phrases, or clauses written in a series.
• The candidate promised to lower taxes, protect the environment, and reduce crime.
• Rule 2:  Use commas to separate independent clauses when they are joined by any of these seven coordinating conjunctions: and, but, for, or, nor, so, yet.
• I have painted the entire house, but he is still working on sanding the doors.
• Rule 3: Use commas after introductory clauses or phrases that come before the main clause, and introductory words such as well, no or yes. 
• While I was eating, the cat scratched at the door.  (There's a long dead English rule that said three or more words in the introductory clause did not require a comma, so many people mess it up nowadays.  But the rule now is that any introductory phrase get a comma).
• Yes, I do need that report.
• Rule 4:  Use a pair of commas in the middle of a sentence to set off clauses, phrases, and words that are NOT essential to the meaning of the sentence.  If these words are dropped, the sentence will still retain the same meaning.
• I am, as you probably noticed, very nervous about this.
• Rule 5: Use commas to separate two or more adjectives that describe the same noun when the word "and" can be inserted between them.
• He is a strong, healthy man.  (He is a strong and healthy man).
• Rule 6: Use commas to set off all geographical names, items in dates, addresses, and titles in names.
• I lived in San Francisco, California, for twenty years.  (No comma is needed after the state if the state's name is abbreviated.)
• She met her husband on December 5, 2003, in Mill Valley, California.
• They met in December 2003.  (No comma is needed if the entire date is not used.)
• Al Baker, M.D., is our doctor.
• Rule 7: Use commas to separate a direct quotation from the rest of the sentence.
• Mother asked, "Who wants to get ice cream?"
• "I do," he said.
• Rule 8: Use commas when necessary to prevent possible confusion or misreading.
• To Steve, Lincoln was the greatest president.  (This is an introductory clause, so it actually falls under that rule, but there are other instances that don't fit neatly into one of these other rules.  But beware: "To prevent misreading" does not mean to add a comma whenever you pause to take a breath.)
• Rule 9:  Use commas before or surrounding the name or title of a person directly addressed.
• Will you, Sam, have the surgery?
• Yes, Doctor, I will.  (Capitalize a title only when directly addressing someone.)
• Rule 10: Use a comma to separate a statement from a question.
• I can go, can't I?
• Rule 11:  Use a comma to separate contrasting parts of a sentence.
• That's my money, not yours.
• Rule 12: Use commas surrounding words such as 'therefore' and 'however' when they are used as interruptors (not conjunctions) .
• I would, therefore, like a response.
• I will be happy, however, to volunteer my time.
• Mr. Baines lives in Tucson; however, his children live in Phoenix. (used as conjunction)
• Rule 13: Comma splices.  Two complete thoughts are not connected with a comma unless there is a conjunction.
• I'm going to town, I'll be back soon.  (Comma splice!)
• I'm going to town, but I'll be back soon.  (Correct usage.)
• I' m going to town; I'll be back soon. (Not incorrect, but these two ideas are not connected closely enough to warrant a semicolon.) 
• I' m going to town.  I'll be back soon. (This is the ideal way to punctuate these thoughts.)

Anyone have any rules they'd like to add?  Anyone catch me violating one of these rules in this very post?  Comment below!